nino

''WORDS'' [1] - Can't she be less of an asshole? [2] - Yeah. You know, she's such a [[snob.->Snob]] [3] - She's just that way because she's a [[spoiled rich brat.->Spoiled Brat]] [2] - Pfft, haha, I know, right? [3] - Tsk. Like, she thinks she can buy us out or something. Who does she think we are? ... I know. I get it. You think I can't tell that you don't like me? You think I don't know what's going on from the cold shoulder alone? You think I'm not listening to the words behind my back? You think I care about what's said behind closed doors? You think I care if I'm all alone? Do you think I care? No. No, I don't care. No. [[I don't care...->Care]]

''CARE'' These bitches. So what? You walked out on me. You're going to be back. I know you will. You guys are nothing without me. You guys //WERE// nothing without me. You all have to come back to me. So... where are you all...? Ugh. Ugh, fuck. Fuck you all. [[Fuck you...->Fuck You]]

Fuck you. Fuck you all. Fuck you all! Ugh, fuck you. Fuckyoufuckyoufuckyou! Fuck you all! Fuck you! Fuck you... Urgh... AAHHH! ''FUCK YOU!'' (text-colour:red)[ #FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! #FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! #FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! #FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! #FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! #FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! #FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! #FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU!]

''SPOILED BRAT'' It didn't matter what I asked for. My mother and father would let me have it. Whatever food I wanted for dinner the next day... The newest games and game consoles... The purses and jewelry... The designer clothes... A pretty dress... I didn't even need to throw a fit, because in their eyes, I was perfect. Why is it not the same for anyone else? Can no one can see just how wonderful I am? How smart I am, how pretty I am? How I give them [[gifts -> Gift]] to show that I care about them? How they should be happy to have a friend like me? How I'm trying so hard to relate to them but they just won't even give me the opportunity to do it? I'm trying as hard as I can. It's frustrating. It's not fair.

''GIFT'' Michie had been coming to the empty clubroom for a while. It was her birthday. It was my last year at school, so I figured that it was my one and only opportunity to do something for her. It didn't matter that... the people I thought were my "friends" ran off with the things that I gave them... ...Because this is Michie. Michie is different from them. --- "Hey." "Hm?" "I got you this..." I handed her a small, black box. "This is... for me?" She asked, actually looking surprised at something for once. "Heh, yeah." "You know, you really didn't have to." "Nah... I couldn't help myself." She threw her [[cigarette->Cigarette]] out of the window and opened up the box. An earring shaped like a cross. She just stared at it. "W-well, do you like it?" She kept staring at it. "Ahaha, I-I know, I know, it's not, like, the biggest gift, I-I mean, I didn't pay too much for it or anything, it's just that, uhhh, I don't know, I thought it looked cool! Really cool... L-like you-" Before I could even finish, she spoke up, her eyes still fixed on it. "It's cute..." "...Huh? Cute?" "Yeah... It's really cute. I love it. Thank you, Nino." She looked up at me and smiled. ... "N-Nino? Are you crying?" --- I... never imagined that a smile would hurt me in the way that Michie's would, but it did. It really hurt. It really, really hurt.

''SNOB'' I remember seeing the sign on one of the doors-- a film club! I was my first year, and I couldn't think of a better opportunity to get to know people that liked movies as much as I did. And I tried. I tried so hard to get everyone there to like me, because outside of this club? I was nobody. No one really... //got it// when I talked about the movies I did like, but that was fine. I thought I was doing a good job of it, because everyone would turn and smile at me whenever I was there. For my last year, I took the reins as club president. They all watched the movies I had been talking about for so long, but the discussions were always quiet... It was just me talking most of the time. For a while, I thought I was failing them as the club leader. I wanted to do something exciting for them. After pushing for it, our club was given the greenlight. The school would help fund a film for us to show everyone at the culture assembly before I graduated. I was ecstatic. I made the push. I wanted to direct this film and make something unforgettable for me and for them. Then they showed their true colors. They were okay with it at first. It must have been because I took a lot of the work. Then, they kept giving me half-hearted responses. I thought they were all as passionate about this as I was? Were we not on the same page? Then they stopped showing up to filming. Wasn't I right to be upset with them? Time was running out. They just couldn't be bothered anymore. They walked out on me. I was alone. I was so fucking naive.

''CIGARETTE'' "Hey, Michie." "Yeah?" "Give me a pack of cigarettes." "Uh... Nino? You probably shouldn't..." "C'mon." "No." "Pretty please? I'll pay you for it." "No." "Michie, please! Pleaaaase!" "Why are you even asking...?" "Fine... Fine. I need it for the movie I'm filming." "Um, you were filming a movie?" "...You know that this is the //FILM CLUB// whose classroom you've been squatting in, right?!" "Huh. Guess this whole time I never even knew, nope." "Ugh." --- The cultural assembly came by, and the school expected something great from the film club. Word got out quick about everyone walking out on the club. Walking out on me. It was fine, though. I just said to the advisor that the filming had already finished and that the movie would be great. And yes, it was great. No, it was more than great. It was beautiful. Michie's camerawork was nothing short of shaky and nausea-inducing. Yes, this was my masterpiece-- a montage of me smoking in every conceivable corner of the school, flipping off the camera every other shot. I looked at the entire audience. They seemed confused. Dumbfounded. Some of the people I used to know laughed at first, but as the movie kept dragging on and on, they started to look very, very uncomfortable. They looked at me like I was someone else entirely. That made me smile. I could barely see Michie in the front-- first-years have the privilege of getting the best seats. She was barely holding back her laughter the whole time. Eventually, the projector got turned off, and I got lovingly escorted out of the auditorium. I got suspended for it, but it was no big deal to me. --- I got back a week before graduation. No one could even look at me in the eye anymore. My teachers? They treated me with disdain. My old club mates? They walked by me pretending I didn't exist. It felt... Nice. It felt nice to not have to care about people liking me or not. As a matter of fact, I prefered it that way. There was still a leftover cigarette from the pack Michie gave to me. I remember lighting it, thinking about her. It was nice. She, like everyone else, would just be a bygone memory eventually... I didn't want that, though. I tried to keep her memory alive the best I could. I kept buying cigarettes... I grew out my hair... Just a little piece of her to keep close to me and to show her I still cared about her, I guess. So that I didn't feel alone leaving her... ...Ugh. I'm such a loser.